My Family

I have an weird-ish relationship with my family..

Okay so to start. Well I start with my sister.

My sister is probably my biggest supporter. She's the one that will be like um.. ya but what if you did it like this ?? Just a suggestion. She just .. I mean I can't agree with her all the time nor do I like what she says. But I have chosen to now hear it and maybe then just tweak it. She's my best friend. She's like really one of my only friends. She knows everything and I trust her with everything. I love my sister.

My brother Bobby.. I have issues with. Um.. after my house had exploded Bobby had become at that time like my wall. He was the one that kept being my support. He watched out for me and had my back. I don't know really what happened. I know that once I got pregnant with Brayden he was mad, I don't know if that's what it was but our relationship around that time ended. We both seem to reach out a bit but only to then just say oh well. I miss my brother.

Steven and I .. hahaha.. our relationship was always weird. He used to come home from college and say 'get my stuff bitch' I was 11.. you shouldn't call me a bitch. But I have just gotten over that. Only because I now say that a word is a word .. you can make anything mean and bad if you want to .. it doesn't need to be a curse word.

Richard and I .. funny how it is .. but we've gained a better relationship because of Nascar. He comes out each year and we have a good time. He'll call and we can talk ... where before we hadn't. So I'm like taking this and running. I like him tho too because I know he supports my mothers actions towards my dad but yet when we ever talk about it he chooses to not respond back harshly or whatnot.. he takes in what I say and then responds. I definitely respect him a lot for that!

I did have brothers that past away.. I don't know much about them. My mom says I can ask but she also doesn't like to talk about it so I tend to not ask .. usually. When back home I know have decided to make sure to go visit their sites. They are my family.

I left my last brother .. Mark. He's my oldest brother. I suck at being a sister to him. He left when I was 5 to go into the army. I remember that day and I hated it! At that point he was the one who I could count on. I don't blame him or anything but I just hated every time that he was assigned to leave. And he knows it to this day. He knows that if he calls and says that he's supposed to go somewhere that I'll cry. I don't want him leaving anymore. I hate it!

But I am proud of my brother. He has done great things and I am proud of him for it. He's like dad. He's very much like dad.

I'm proud of my family. I mean I have 3 siblings that are teachers.. Great teachers too! They have all (well cept for Rich .. sorry haha) have a great wife or husband and it continues to give me a bigger family in which I just love.

I love family I want to consume it. I can't wait for my boys to enjoy it. I want them to enjoy it.

I think that's why I love playing games so much because I want them to just enjoy life and maybe sometimes just 'PLAY'.. what's wrong with it.. nothing in my eyes.

I miss my family.. I miss them!

Wished I would have taken the moments that I did have a little more serious and be happy about those moments .. nothing for granted

And it does suck knowing that I'm the fucked up one. I love my family and here .. they got me. It sucks knowing that! I don't want that.. I wished I could give them something other but ya.. here I am.