WHy?????? WHY????
I can't stand you but it seems I can't live without you either. :(
Why I feel the way I do.. I don't know.. I wished only that I could feel that calm.. that feeling of it doesn't matter and it's all good.
Only problem.. it isn't.
I see the mirror.. I see what others see. It bothers me because deep down my heart isn't what I portray. I am easily hurt. I cry a lot. I wished others saw how soft hearted I am. But well I'm a bitch.
I'm a bitch because I have to protect myself. I'm the only one looking out for myself.. so I have to defend myself so if that means being a bitch well that's what it is..
Why isn't it ppl can't see me for me?? I'm not always right or nice or whatever but I don't want to hurt you.. why can't you see that??
Guess there's something wrong with me :(
Monday, August 26, 2013
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Do You Ever?
There are times that I will be sitting here and will pull my legs up. grab them so tight! and just breath.
I don't understand why I can't get over this. Why I've become so raw. It completely sucks!!!
Just wish that someone could convince me that I am how I think I am. I look in the mirror .. not at my body but my eyes and they are so sad I hate it!!! I don't know how to get over it. Wished I could thousands and thousands of times!!
This is not the life that I want for anyone.. not myself and def. not for anyone else. SO hey if you read this and your in your teenage yrs.. try to belive this! God made you to be you! You are your own person beautiful inside and out. Don't got down this road it gets you pretty much no where. I would never think of having that towards my worst enemy tohave.. the thoughts I do.
Hug yourself.. love youself!!!! That's what I keep trying to tell me. God has me here for a reason .. believe it! Convince yourself.. hear it .. open your ears and listen.. it's hard it's not a fun road but belive that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I don't understand why I can't get over this. Why I've become so raw. It completely sucks!!!
Just wish that someone could convince me that I am how I think I am. I look in the mirror .. not at my body but my eyes and they are so sad I hate it!!! I don't know how to get over it. Wished I could thousands and thousands of times!!
This is not the life that I want for anyone.. not myself and def. not for anyone else. SO hey if you read this and your in your teenage yrs.. try to belive this! God made you to be you! You are your own person beautiful inside and out. Don't got down this road it gets you pretty much no where. I would never think of having that towards my worst enemy tohave.. the thoughts I do.
Hug yourself.. love youself!!!! That's what I keep trying to tell me. God has me here for a reason .. believe it! Convince yourself.. hear it .. open your ears and listen.. it's hard it's not a fun road but belive that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
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